Moving On

   My husbands parents helped us make the move. The ranch was outside of a small, tourist town. We were at the base of a beautiful mountain range and had an amazing view off of our front porch! It was very quiet and peaceful. It was a great place for a little boy to spend the first couple years of his life! It brought my hubby and I even closer, only having each other. And all of my spare time was spent just Brayden and I! I cherish those memories everyday and always will! We stayed in Wyoming for two years, and that is also when what was left of my parents marriage started unraveling. My mom would call saying she was leaving for the night to stay in a hotel because they were fighting again. This is when she really started changing from what was her "normal." (Which we will get into later.) We also got pregnant with baby #2 in that time frame. From the moment I was pregnant, I had the overwhelming feeling it was a girl! Needless to say, ultrasound confirmed my suspicions! We were blessed with our son and now...a DAUGHTER! We were so excited! But, once again, I began having my fears. Although, they were different then the first time mom fears. I was so confused at the why the relationship with my mother was the way it was, and was so nervous about having a daughter myself. Would I be like my mom? Would I be able to be there for her and be the mom she deserved?
   We decided we wanted to move back, closer to family again. Also, if you know the ranch life, my husband was working a ridiculous amount of hours and rarely getting to be with us. It was finally something we both had had enough of. So, we came back to Colorado. My hubby had a couple job opportunities ready. He was offered a position and we were given the rest of the day to find a place to live. It was NOT easy, but we did it! A small 3 bedroom apartment, which at the time, was our last option. We got everything lined up and prepared to make the move back. Once we got back, my hubby had a few loose ends to tie up with the new job, before he could start. But then it turned to days of not getting to start the job, and then weeks. He finally went back to one of his former places of employment, only to find out they were in desperate need of the position my hubby was looking for! Once again, we could both breath easy! He has been working there ever since.
   About 2 months after we moved back, my due date was approaching. We scheduled another induction and had a few days to spend as our family of 3. I was so nervous and sad about my baby boy not being my "baby" anymore. I also didn't know if I was still going to be able to give him the attention he deserved and was used to, which I'm sure a lot of second time moms deal with. I was thankful that we were back close to family during this time!